When I was a kid I was fascinated with the black and white film stars. I got my first film picture books for Christmas when I was ten, I still have them. I'd spend hours going through every page looking at the glamour shots and movie stills. I can't recall what I was thinking every time I opened one of the books or what would put me in the mood for that sort of thing.
There was only one time I remember going through the pages trying to find someone I looked like (wanted to look like). I do remember being convinced that if photographed in black and white I could possibly look like Ava Gardner or Ingrid Bergman, it was all a matter of tilting my head right and getting the shadows to fall in a certain way. My Abuelita in Mexico must have seen what I was thinking at that moment because she said to me, in Spanish, that if I did my eyebrows just right, I'd look just like Ingrid Bergman. She said it so convincingly I remember closing the book and feeling really glamorous for the rest of the day. I didn't seek out a mirror to challenge what she had said. I didn't try to make my eyebrows look like Ms Bergman's, I only knew my Grandmother made me feel good because she understood me. We then went for a walk.