Missing: Dogs in Space OST Cassette Tape
My daughter discovered the tape recorder, my old cassette collection and the joys of making her own mix-tape. I had a box with all the special and most valued cassettes: Dogs In Space and Yoko Ono were in this box. The box went missing. The other night I thought of when this could have happened. After divorce #1, #2 or #3.... each time I lost more of my things. Some I would miss like the cobolt blue candle holders I bought at BookPeople with my first paycheck from there. I lost records, CDs, books and DVDs, once gifted to me, but taken back in divorce #2. There were records that went missing with the record collector in divorce #3. Thing is, I probably would have purged most of these things anyway, as every few years I collect a box of things I no longer like and place them at the back door of a thrift store.
That was not the case with this box of cassette tapes. I purchased them all myself, never connected to any relationship, only myself. To this day I still love the Dogs in Space OST and Yoko Ono. I thought of a woman I met in NYC and how we became friends and I once had her visit. She was cool and I loved what we found to talk about and her view on things. She also had a connection to Dogs in Space. The person I was married to at the time left the house while she stayed over, and then became angry when she wanted to stay longer. I said, "Sure, of course, love to have more time with you". I can't remember how many more days she stayed over. The person I was married to could have returned to our home whenever, we had a guest room and privacy. Soon after that he asked for a divorce. When I told my NYC friend she never responded. I figured she had some loyalty to the person I was divorcing, or some other strange reason I didn't understand. It made me angry not hearing from her through the tears, packing up, moving out. So I lost her friendship in the whole thing, and that was both sad and weird. The soon to be ex-husband didn't care for her and listed her stay as one of his grievances against me. It was something I didn't regret, though it was annoying defending someone who just ghosted me.
So the other night, when I couldn't sleep, I wondered if maybe I gifted it to her and didn't remember. In any case, it has been almost twenty years and I hope she is the one who has it. It was a nice visit. I hate that what came up in my life caused my relationship with her to fall off. It was like carrying a stack of things out of the house, or placing boxes on the ground to load into the trunk of a car, something fell, I didn't see it, something was left behind, I didn't notice at the time. Later, once arriving at a safe place, once unpacking, never found again. I wonder where that box went, I wonder were a lot of things were left and I wonder how she is doing.
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